Moonlit Vows Of Vengeance

Chapter 105: Confused Feelings

The moment my feet touched the soil of my world again, I felt it—raw, ruptured magic rippling beneath the surface like a wounded heartbeat.

The portal slammed shut behind us with a thundering crack, its last wisps of light vanishing into the dark sky. We were back.

Ash choked the air. The ground reeked of death and scorched stone. The wind howled as if mourning what once thrived here. My once-sacred land was a graveyard.

I stepped forward slowly, my boots sinking slightly into soft, broken earth. The trees were skeletal, the sky a bruised gray. The palace walls stood in the distance—half-collapsed, black vines crawling up its cracked spires like claws clinging to a corpse.

Lucas stepped beside me, silent.

I couldn’t look at him.

I didn’t want to.

Not after everything.

Not after I gave him my trust—my body—and he still lied.

Still hid.

Still betrayed.

I turned to him, barely able to keep my hands from trembling. Not from fear. From fury.

"You knew," I said, my voice sharp and cold, even though my heart ached.

"Like I said earlier, I really was trying to protect you."

"Protect me?" I laughed—a bitter, hollow sound. "By keeping me in the dark continuously? By dragging me away before I could fix what they broke?"

"I had no choice—"

"You always have a choice!" I snapped, stepping closer to him. "You had a choice the day you made that deal. You have a choice to tell me the truth right now."

His face twisted in pain, jaw clenched. "You don’t understand—"

"No," I hissed. "You don’t get to speak."

Lira came out from behind and stepped forward. I didn’t know how long she had been there for... I didn’t notice her presence. Her expression was stricken, her eyes glassy with unshed tears. "Athena, please... don’t do this."

I looked at her, and my chest tightened with something sharp and sour. She looked so much like him—eyes full of guilt and devotion all at once. But she hadn’t betrayed me. Not like he had.

Still, she was his sister. And I knew what she would choose.

My gaze flicked back to Lucas, who stood tall despite the storm inside him. His mouth opened like he wanted to plead, to say something that might change it all.

But I was already walking away.

"Leave the kingdom," I said over my shoulder. "Now. And don’t let me see your face again."

Silence.

The kind that carved itself into memory.

Then I heard his voice, soft and hoarse behind me.

"If that’s what you want..."

I didn’t turn. I couldn’t.

A few moments later, I heard his footsteps retreat. Steady. Controlled. Like he was holding every emotion inside by the teeth.

Lira hesitated. I could feel her presence like a ghost behind me.

"He’s still your ally," she said softly.

"He was," I replied. "Not anymore."

She said nothing for a long time. Just the wind, and the distant sound of the ruined world groaning around us.

"I don’t agree with what he did," Lira said. "But I know my brother. And I know he’s breaking, Athena."

"He should break," I murmured. "He broke me."

When I turned, I thought maybe—just maybe—she’d stay.

But her face told me everything.

"I can’t leave him," she whispered, voice shaking. "I love you, and I’m grateful that you saved. But I won’t leave him. Not again."

I nodded.

Then go with him.

She flinched like I slapped her.

I turned again before she could change her mind, before I could change mine. I walked away without looking back.

And when I finally stepped through the shattered outer gate of the kingdom and looked behind me—

They were gone.

Lucas and Lira. Both.

And I had never felt so alone.

I kept walking until the ruins swallowed me.

But I was already cracking.

The moment their footsteps disappeared into the distance, a silence more terrifying than any battlefield settled over me. The kind that echoes in your bones. The kind that reminds you just how much you’ve lost.

I don’t know how I found my way to my room. To where I stayed temporarily. The tears came before I could stop them.

Hot. Furious. Endless.

I curled in on myself, fists clenched in the dirt, my shoulders shaking with every sob I’d buried since this all began.

Since I lost my home.

Since I lost my powers.

Since I found out who I really was... and how much that cost.

Since Lucas.

Gods, Lucas.

Even after all the lies, all the betrayals... part of me still wanted to believe he was mine. That if I reached for him, he’d be there. That his touch wasn’t a dagger in disguise.

But he wasn’t here.

He chose to leave.

And I’d told him to.

A hand touched my shoulder. Gentle. Steady. Familiar.

I froze.

"Athena," Kieran’s voice was soft, deeper than usual.

I didn’t turn to look at him. I couldn’t. Not like this. Not sobbing into the dirt like some shattered thing. Not when I was supposed to be their goddess, their queen.

"I’m fine," I choked, wiping my face with the back of my hand. "Just... leave me alone." noveldrama

He didn’t.

Instead, he sat beside me in the ash. Not saying a word. Just sitting. His presence calm. Solid.

We sat like that for what felt like an eternity—two battle-worn souls in a graveyard of memories.

"I didn’t ask them to choose," I snapped, but the heat vanished almost immediately, melting into grief. "I just wanted the truth. For once. I wanted someone to stay."

Silence again. But not cold this time. Not empty.

Just real.

Then Kieran said something I didn’t expect.

"I would always choose you."

I turned to him then, really looked at him. His hair was wind-swept, dirt smudged across one cheek, armor dull from weeks of war. But his eyes... they were steady. Unmoving. Always on me.

"You don’t have to carry this alone anymore," he said. "Not as a goddess. Not as a ruler."

A tear slipped down my cheek again, but I didn’t wipe it away.

Kieran leaned closer, resting his forehead gently against mine.

"I’m not Lucas," he murmured. "But I’ve been here. Every battle. Every collapse. I saw you rise when others fled. I’ll keep standing with you, even when you can’t stand yourself."

Something inside me splintered and softened at once.

I didn’t know if it was love.

But it was comfort.

And for now, that was enough.

I closed my eyes, let my head rest against his shoulder, and whispered, "Thank you."

Kieran’s presence was steady warmth at my side. It wasn’t like Lucas—storm and wildfire, always threatening to burn me alive. No. Kieran was the quiet strength after the ruin. The last flame that refused to die.

I hadn’t realized how tightly I was clinging to his arm until he moved—and then suddenly, he pulled me into him completely. His arms wrapped around me with a force I wasn’t expecting, as if something inside him had finally cracked.

I stiffened for a second, caught off guard by how tightly he held me.

"Kieran...?"

He didn’t let go. Just pressed his face into the crook of my neck, his breathing uneven, strained.

"I’m sorry," he murmured, voice thick with something I couldn’t name.

I tried to pull back, just to see his face, to ask what he meant, but his grip only tightened. "Hey... what is it? What do you really want from me?"

He froze.

His breath hitched.

And then he whispered, "No. Nothing."

Nothing.

A lie.

There was too much trembling in that word. Too much fire behind the silence that followed.

Before I could press him again, a wave of something strange rippled through me—hot, sharp, and alive.

I gasped.

It started low in my belly and spread fast, like flames licking under my skin. My hands trembled, and I pulled away from Kieran instinctively, my body suddenly too warm, too sensitive, too aware.

My breath caught. "What... what is this?"

He looked at me, alarmed. "Athena?"

"I—" My vision swam for a moment. The world tilted. Heat surged up my spine, curling around my neck, down my arms, between my thighs.

No. This wasn’t normal. It wasn’t just physical—it was magical.

Like something in me had broken loose and was flooding everything at once.

I stumbled back, and Kieran caught me again.

"What’s happening to you?"

"I don’t know." I was panting now. The heat was unbearable. My skin burned, my thoughts tangled. It wasn’t just lust, it wasn’t just magic—it was both. Intertwined. Ferocious. Wild.

I clutched his arm, trying to ground myself.

A sound left me—half-moan, half-cry. "Kieran—"

He stared at me, wide-eyed, then nodded slowly, trying to keep calm.

"No." I shook my head. "I’m not... I’m not weak."

"I didn’t say you were."

But I could see it in his eyes—the fear. Not of me, but for me.

I hated that.

I hated that whatever this was, it made me feel helpless again.

The heat licked over my body like a fever.